Swirling Thoughts #141 – sometimes the holes in my vocabulary are more significant than others. Even if I am capable of filling out moadone forms...

Do Israelis not eat soft-boiled eggs?
For all the different ways I enjoy my Israeli breakfast, today I wanted something a little simpler – the comfort food my mom always made when I was feeling a bit under the weather. I wanted a soft-boiled egg. So easy to make. So difficult to order.
Efshar soft-boiled egg?
Ma?
Egg (hand gestures indicating round egg). Lo livtoak (Don’t open it). Laseem b’mayim cham beshveel shalosh dakot (Put in hot water for 3 minutes).
A puzzled look and then,
Beseder.
He tells the other guy to put an egg in a cup of hot water and leave it there for three minutes. Hmm… can you actually cook an egg in a cup of hot water? Why don’t I know how to say cook? Cook the egg for three minutes! I wanted to say. I should be in ulpan RIGHT NOW!
Oolye hamesh dakot (Maybe five minutes).
When my order was ready (exactly one minute later) I thought surely I would be opening up a raw egg. But, alas, no. It was a hardboiled egg, warmed up special for me in a cup of hot water.

I should let Bob do all the shopping
For 10 months I stayed out of Fox (Israel’s answer to Old Navy?). Not because there’s anything wrong with Fox. Quite the contrary. Clothes-shopping is simply not coded in my DNA. I see Fox, Golf, Zara, even Mish Mish and I quickly start looking for the nearest coffee shop. Or pharmacy – because I have no trouble shopping for diapers, wipes, or even 80 shekel sunscreen while balancing a café afook.

But today, I not only made my way into Fox. I succeeded in picking out clothes for the kids, using a store credit (which I wasn’t even sure was a store credit) and I allowed myself to be caught up in the hype surrounding a decision to opt in to the moadone (club membership). How could I not – even with the 60 shekel fee my total was reduced by forty shekels! And I now have a 100 shekel credit for the month of Yuni (June)! Let’s not forget the 30% discount in my birthday month! Knowing myself (read: all this excitement will be forgotten the minute I exit the store), I told Becky to remind me to come shopping in Yuni.

While I was busy attempting to transform my genetic make-up, Bob was in the pharmacy picking up diapers, opting out of the pharmacy moadone.
Lo, todah (no, thank you)
Mapitone? (What are you saying?)
Lo, lo.
(calling after him) But you can save 20 shekels!
Lo, todah, lo.

Less excitement, but undoubtedly, greater savings. With the added satisfaction of mystifying the Israeli salesclerk.