Monday, November 2, 2009

Swirling Thoughts #77 - Stupid Idiot Boots

I moved to the desert, right? We pray for and celebrate rain here, right? I came with 44 coats plus ponchos and rain boots for each member of my family, just in case, right? So what did I do wrong? Evidently a lot. We’re in the middle of some psycho storm from Cyprus – who knew? The kind of rain in which you cannot carry an umbrella because the accompanying wind turns the umbrella into a launchable missile.

Becky sobbing and screaming.
Becky came down in socks and water shoes, screaming her refusal to wear “stupid idiot rain boots”. Her rain boots are yellow. They should have been blue. Also no good – her yellow rain slicker. Her choice – a pink windbreaker and pink earmuffs. Did I mention it is freezing cold outside in addition to pouring rain and whipping wind?

Rosie sobbing and screaming.
I loaned the housekeeper the Dora umbrella so she could hitchhike home in the rain last week. That would have been okay if the umbrella was back in our house this morning which it clearly was not. The fact that Bob carried Rosie to school under the huge Barney’s umbrella and that she wouldn’t have been able to manage her Dora umbrella in the wind – totally irrelevant.

Barbara not sobbing and screaming but her face all crinkled up getting ready to sob and scream.
I ordered Barbara yellow boots about a month ago. Once I placed the order she came to me and said, “The boots you ordered – they’re not yellow are they?” I headed that one off at the pass by ordering her a pair she picked out and pushing the yellow ones on Asher.

Me, ready to sob and scream.
Asher, my soldier, dutifully taking orders, flopped down the stairs looking like the Gorton’s Fisherman – yellow boots and matching slicker. Bob to Asher, “Are those boots too big for you? Lisa, I think Asher’s boots are too big for him. Look at how big these boots are. These boots are definitely too big.” Stupid idiot boots.

1 comment:

  1. hey, can't be right all the time!!!!!