Swirling Thoughts #82 – intended meaning

“Would you like trout with your bagel?” – trout meaning whitefish spread, of course...
While my mother-in-law and I were enjoying American style bagels and cream cheese in the German Colony, Bob was on a tiyul with Asher’s ulpan – in honor of the yahrzeit of Rachel Imeinu last week, they started out on a “quick and easy” hike on Derech HaAvot (literally, the path our forefathers, Avraham and Yitzhak took) followed by a trip to Kever Rachel (Rachel’s Tomb) and then a picnic in Gilo Park in Jerusalem.

Bring a hat means bring a hat – about this we mean business!
The trip note specified to bring a hat and plenty of water. Upon their arrival the teachers made sure everyone had a hat. Those who didn’t were issued a hat from the lost-and-found. Bob heard the kids saying, “Oh! But we’ll get lice!” And the teacher reassuring them, “It’s okay, it’s okay.” Later in the trip there was an incident involving a child, some food allergy and then hives. And the teacher saying, “It’s okay – we’ll be home in an hour!”

A quick and easy hike...
At least that was the intention. Quick because it was a mile and a half – from Alon Shvut to Neve Daniel. But no one counted on the need for snack breaks every five minutes. 2 hours to walk a mile and a half. For people like me who are all about pace, that’s an 80 minute mile. And then there was the easy part. Easy because there was a path. But no one counted on the hot weather (“It’s so hot!” “I’m so sweaty!” now repeat in a British accent to get the full effect). In spite of it all, they had a great time.

Jokes designed to induce labor
Ever since we started playing beat the clock (read: Bob plans to leave on my due date) I’ve been on the receiving end of hilarious stories, poems and jokes. The idea being I will laugh myself into labor. And then there’s the walking. Since Shabbat I have been tackling everything from steep stone stair cases to uneven Old City cobblestone. Last night, in search of a shish kabob restaurant on the order of David’s (yes, the last time I ate good shish kabob was on Kings Highway), we hiked up and down Ben Yehuda and Yaffo Streets. Until the kids were almost in labor. As Bob anxiously awaits it appears my baby has hunkered down for some more iced coffee and chocolate. Looks like the joke is on him…